Office Productivity

Yesterday was Earth Day, but due to a vehicle that got pissy, I didn’t get to my computer top put up this particular post. My lovely Dodge Caravan has thrown some amazing things at me over the years - a transmission that had to be replaced, a window that forgot how to go back up, tires that did the Sean Connery (balded), and other little glitches that I can’t even begin to identify.

This time it caught me off guard, though. My youngest daughter and I came out of Kroger (our grocery store and home away from home - it even has a Starbucks inside). We put our groceries in the back and ourselves in the front. She gets her Mayday Parade cd ready to throw in, I put the key in the ignition and….and… And nothing. The key won’t turn. My mini-me is like, “Are you kidding???” and reaches over to try (after all, Mom must be doing it wrong, right? There are so many different ways to turn a key…).

We’re stuck. One call to the husand and countless minutes later the wrecker hauls my darling off - the Caravan, not the Mayday Parade fan or my knight in khakis…

Anyway, here’s the link I would have posted about yesterday if yesterday hadn’t been in such a nasty mood: It’s Easy Being Green: Five Ways to Go Green in 2008 deals with how you can, and should, get your green on at the office. Great stuff!

Green is the New Black, and Yellow, and Red, and Blue… is a post on one of my other blogs - one that I did pre-Kroger yesterday.

Monday? Check.

Tax Day Eve? Check.

The “cream” of our “political crop” bickering like first graders? Check. Check.

If today doesn’t call for a little funny bone tickling, I’m not sure what does.

THE REALLY WILD WILD WEST

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was determined to keep the ranch , but knew very little about ranching, so she placed an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other was a playboy with a drinking problem. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the playboy .

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks the two of them worked hard and the ranch was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher’s widow said, “You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels.”

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town on Saturday night.

He returned around 2: 30 am, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher’s widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her.

“Unbutton my blouse and take it off,” she said. Trembling, he did as she directed.

“Now take off my boots.” He did as she asked, ever so slowly.

“Now take off my socks.” He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

“Now take off my skirt.” He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

“Now take off my bra.” Again, with trembling hands did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

Then she looked at him and said: “If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you’re fired!”

Disclaimer:
* Joi, and Office Freaks, knows full well that not all playboys drink and not all drinkers are playboys. Oh, and most gay men dress better than all of us put together, and wouldn’t be caught straight in any of the aforementioned items of clothing.

How beautifully unique are these
Chinese Fragrant Wooden Bookmarks—Characters of Three Kingdoms?

I love just about all things Oriental - the food, the art, the writings, the clothes. Everything’s just so beautiful and exotic!

This set of bookmarks is no exception.

From the Web Site:

Ten famous characters of Three Kingdoms (Zhou Yu, Cao Cao, Zhuge Liang, Guan Yu, Zhao Yun, Huang Zhong, Zhang Fei, Sun Quan, Liu Bei and Lv Bu) are featured on these wooden bookmarks. The set of 10 are handcrafted in fine hardwoods with the dimensions of 6″3/4 x 3″1/2.

Gorgeous!

Even if you aren’t that into bookmarks, you’ll want to click through the link (or image) to see everything offered on this web site. The more you look around, the more blown away you’ll be.

If you spend as much time at a desk as I do (at least 6 hours a day), you’re all too familiar with the backaches, the muscle tension, the aches, the pains, etc. Research has shown that long hours at the desk can cause a host of problems: lower back pain, fatigue, headaches, a loss of flexibility, and even lead to poor posture. I add to my own woes by having a weird tendency to sit on at least one leg most of the time. I’ve been known to pull them both up into the chair with me. A quick self check just discovered that I’m doing it now, actually.

Certified personal trainer and founder of “Get Fit in 6″ suggests that those of us who are in this particular boat look into purchasing a “foam roller” and/or a Medicine Ball.

The image at the top of the post is a foam roller. Target sells this particular one. You can click HERE to find it online, but if you have a Target near you, I’m pretty sure they’d have it in stock.

I’ve never tried one of these foam rollers, but I HAVE used a Medicine Ball before, though, and recommend them highly. They are a back’s best friend because they provide you with a gentle but oh so effective stretch.

I’ve also treated my feet to smaller medicine balls before after a long day at the mall. Shopping can be pretty draining on a body, too. Rubbing the soles of your feet over the balls gives them a great little massage that makes them happy campers again.

When you get a chance, you might want to check out a Medicine Ball for yourself. They’re pretty sweet.

To super charge your week, start it off by reading some profoundly motivational quotes by Orison Swett Marden.

Be warned though, he makes you feel as though you could face any challenge, overcome any obstacle, and come out on top of any situation.

Good stuff.

Here’s a great entry for the Samsung Printer Giveaway contest:

Temperamental would be a good word to describe the monstrously behemoth laser printer in my office. One day, in the midst of a large printing job, it abruptly stopped due to a paper jam. I became dumbstruck when I opened the tray to see what the problem was. There, smack dab on the jammed piece of paper was the perfect impression of a large cockroach! On closer inspection, I realized a cockroach had rolled through the rollers and then traveled through the laser printer. The cockroach had unwittingly sacrificed his life to become a unique piece of office art which subsequently adorned our bulletin board. Thus, the ultimate paper jam has since gone down in our office history. - MKR

I love that they made him into art!

The GPX 7 Portable DVD Player is currently on sale…..to the tune of really big savings…..at Montgomery Ward.

If you have to ask what a portable DVD player has to do with work or an office….I don’t even know you anymore.

Click the link above to see how much you can save.

Success Poster
Buy at AllPosters.com

I absolutely love the motivational/inspirational posters and art prints that feature a word along with a thought or quote. They’re always very well-written and the photography is breathtaking.

But I have to hand it to the people who came up with these spoofs - they’re pretty funny. (The caption at the bottom on the one above reads, “Find the biggest ass and kiss it.”) No, they won’t inspire or motivate you to greatness, but they will bring a smile to your face and maybe even a laugh or two. In my book, that counts for something.

Click each to see the larger image:

Originality Poster
Buy at AllPosters.com

Originality means you don’t care what people say about you.

Ambition Poster
Buy at AllPosters.com

If you can’t swim with the big fish, stay out of the water.

Frustration Art Print
Buy at AllPosters.com

It is a sad fact that regardless of effort or talent - second place only means you are first in a long line of losers

Success Poster
Buy at AllPosters.com

It may pay to get A’s but C’s get degrees.

Expose Yourself to Art Art Print
Buy at AllPosters.com

Expose yourself to art.

There’s one more feircely funny poster on the other side of the link below. It’s separated from the rest because it’s sense of humor is a little….oh, I dunno….dirrrrrttttty. If it would be appropriate for your office, drop to your knees right now and thank God for giving you one crazy cool place to work!
[click to continue...]

There’s an article over on Life Hack that I think you’ll enjoy. It’s called “7 Habits to Win In Office Politics.” After all, we all know that office politics exists - there’s no denying it.

So, if the game exists, you might as well play it well, right? Hopefully….. better than everyone else. This article might just give you the edge you need.

This post is actually the same one that appears today on my Self Help Blog, so if you’re one of the super-sexy, ridiculously beautiful, unspeakably cool and intelligent people who reads both of these blogs - you can skip one of the posts. You know who you are cool beans….both of you.

A week ago, I had the supreme pleasure of reading an e-book, When Money Talks, Listen! by Rich Ezzo. It took only about an hour to read, and that included one trip to the coffee maker and about 10 distractions from Alexa (our cat) who knows she’s the center of the universe. Just try telling her differently.

I’m not a person who sits still well, so I actually began reading with every intention of bookmarking the pdf and finishing later in the day. However, I didn’t realize just how pulled into the delightful fiction I would become. I finished it in one sitting and loved every minute

When I first received a copy, I thought it was a Get Rich Quick-type of publication. Nothing wrong with Getting Rich Quick or any other way, mind you - but my mind just doesn’t chase after dreams of wealth. It has grand plans, mind you, which include saving the world, but I’m not a wealth chaser. I figure that if God ever wants me to be rich, He knows where to find my purse.

Needless to say, when I began reading When Money Talks, Listen!, I was overjoyed to find that Rich Ezzo isn’t money hungry either. He, too, is hungry for things far more important than money.

I absolutely love this e-book. Why wait a week to write the review? Simple. I wanted to see if the impact it had on me was a keeper. After reading the last word of the e-book, I totally agreed with the subtitle which promised to forever change the way we thought about money. I had so many thoughts running around my mind that I had to install a stop light to stop some while others made their way into the picture - then you yield them as a few new ones arrived in town. I had a mental traffic jam, which only goes to show how slow the traffic usually is.

It has been a week and the impact is the same. I truly do look at money differently and have even done a few things differently this week. This is an e-book you’ll want to read, I guarantee it. I often recommend books to my daughters, and this is one that I didn’t just “suggest” - I left it open at the bottom of the computer and told each one, “Read it, you’ll love it.” Like a lot of the meals I fix for them, I didn’t tell them how good it would be for them, just how good it was!

I honestly don’t want to give anything, whatsoever, away about this story, simply because I want you to have the same experience I did. The e-book is less than $10 and will take only about an hour to read. As I’ve said many times on this blog as well as other blogs I publish, I would never recommend anything I didn’t wholeheartedly stand behind. Whether it’s a movie (Sweeney Todd), an author (Dean Koontz), a drink (Panera Bread’s Iced Green Tea), a cause (World Vision), or a way of life (Starbucks) - I would never point someone in a direction I wouldn’t go myself. More telling than that, I’d never recommend something to my readers that I wouldn’t recommend to my daughters.

I urge you to visit the author’s web site, Myster Money, and to download the e-book. You won’t regret it. When you finish the story, keep scrolling (or, better yet, print it out), there are several cool things you’ll want to check out, including lessons that pertain to the story.

We all need more unexpected, life-challenging surprises in our life - they keep us on our toes and keep life interesting. This is one of those special little treats that’ll honestly help you start your year off right. You may even get a head buzzing traffic jam in the process.

One last word, get the e-book.