April 2008

Like a lot of people, I’ve been trying to drink more water lately. I figure that if every expert known to mankind recommends it, there must be something to the madness. I bought bottled water for a long time, so I could take a bottle with me wherever my day took me. But that $tuff adds up fast.

I work from home, so it’s not a big deal for me to trapse into the kitchen and grab a glass of water when the mood hits me (usually somewhere between coffee mug #3 and iced green tea #2). For people who aren’t near their kitchen during the day, there are other options. Like the handsome Avanti Tabletop Water Cooler, above.

From the Manufacturer:

There’s no better break during a long work day than a nice stroll to the watercooler, and even the smallest workspace or home office can fit this mighty mouse! The Avanti Tabletop Thermoelectric Water Cooler/Heater WD31EC offers separate push button faucets for refreshing cold drinking water or piping hot water for coffee, cocoa, and instant soup. Constructed of lightweight and durable ABS thermoplastic, the WD31EC uses compressor-free thermoelectric technology for quiet and cost-efficient cooling. Plus, it’s designed to save extra energy, offering separate on/off power switches for hot and cold water operations and a choice of normal and energy saver modes.

Key features include: full LED display for all functions; built-in cup storage compartment; convenient drain plugs for both hot and cold reservoirs; child safety guard on hot faucet; and uses standard 2, 3, or 5 gallon bottles (not included). The Avanti Tabletop Thermoelectric Water Cooler/Heater WD31EC allows cold or hot water to be dispensed wherever refreshment is needed, whether in the home or office…. or in the home office.

I love… I totally love… Survivor. This season’s no exception, and I’m already geared up for tonight’s episode. I think James might just take it all - maybe Ozzy.

If you’re as into the show as I am, you’ll love the Survivor Limited Edition Apple iPod Touch, above. It’s from the CBS Store and it’s one hot little devil.

From the Website:

The ultimate Survivor collectable. This revolutionary multi-touch interface allows you to flick through album covers and find your music. Download and watch your favorite movies and TV shows as well as tap into thousands of photos. The Survivor iPod Touch is custom laser etched with officially licensed artwork, each is numbered and only 2000 are available in this exclusive limited series. Personalize your collectable Survivor iPod by adding your name (up to 30 characters) for security and self expression.

Official “Survivor” gear from CBS. Shop now!

The Website also has Survivor mugs, bandanas, buffs, tees, a shark key chain, hot dog tag necklaces, and a lot more. They also feature other shows, too, of course - including CSI, The Amazing Race (!!!), Ghost Whisperer, Everybody Loves Raymond, Big Brother, Criminal Minds, 60 Minutes, daytime shows, Letterman, King of Queens….

Click through the link above or the snappy little banner below to check it all out.

Monday? Check.

Tax Day Eve? Check.

The “cream” of our “political crop” bickering like first graders? Check. Check.

If today doesn’t call for a little funny bone tickling, I’m not sure what does.

THE REALLY WILD WILD WEST

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was determined to keep the ranch , but knew very little about ranching, so she placed an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other was a playboy with a drinking problem. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the playboy .

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks the two of them worked hard and the ranch was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher’s widow said, “You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels.”

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town on Saturday night.

He returned around 2: 30 am, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher’s widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her.

“Unbutton my blouse and take it off,” she said. Trembling, he did as she directed.

“Now take off my boots.” He did as she asked, ever so slowly.

“Now take off my socks.” He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

“Now take off my skirt.” He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

“Now take off my bra.” Again, with trembling hands did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

Then she looked at him and said: “If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you’re fired!”

Disclaimer:
* Joi, and Office Freaks, knows full well that not all playboys drink and not all drinkers are playboys. Oh, and most gay men dress better than all of us put together, and wouldn’t be caught straight in any of the aforementioned items of clothing.

So, how’s your week going? Good, good…

Mine? @#7&*$) ridiculous with out a $()#&@* moment of peace or any symbolism of #&&@_$%% normalcy. Thanks for asking.

Yeah, I need a laugh or two or 72,944,388,439.

The Family Guy Standups are perfect for weeks like this. The only way they’d be better is if they came to life and acted out an episode right there in the office. Of course, we wouldn’t get any work done - but after an hour or two we’d be so delirious from laughing we wouldn’t even care. Here are the standups in no particular order - except for the fact that they go from my favorite to my least favorite.

Purdy, right? These Task Chairs (Office Desk Chair - 18518) are so colorful, funky, and bright they’d come close to making one forget that they’re at work. The task chair is available in pink (my favorite color), purple (my favorite color), and blue (my favorite color).

From the Website:
Our Task Chairs add a colorful burst of character all while keeping that sophisticated office look.

Includes threaded height adjustment, padded seat and backrest and a five star nylon base w/ casters.

These delightfully attractive Task Chairs will add a beautiful burst of color and character to your home or office all while retaining a sophisticated look as well. With threaded height adjustment, padded seat and backrest and a five star nylon base with casters, our office chairs are comfortable and ultra durable. The chair’s seat and back cushions are also adjustable.

Assembly required.

If only they were available in my favorite color, red.