How Not to Be a Workplace Ogre

I loves him dearly. Loves his squinky little eyes, his droopy little legs, his fat little fingers —

But an office ogre is anything but cute. He/She makes an already bad situation (which is being at work as opposed to being anyplace else) 10 times worse just by being there. They’re the sort of person that, when they have a sick day - it’s like a vacation day for everyone else.

We all know how to deal with ogres - AVOID them like a bad stink. But, alas, there are days when that just isn’t possible and they’re underfoot and underskin for hours.

A while back, Mayo Clinic put out a good guideline for getting along with co-workers. That guideline’s the basis for the following. It may give you a little inspiration for coping with ogres. More importantly, it’ll help you to not become one yourself - because if your ogre’s in your mirror, you’ll never escape him.

• Be positive. Smile, be upbeat, and greet everyone warmly. Not just the people you think can help you move up the ladder - be friendly to the ladder-holders as well.
• Learn to communicate effectively. Sometimes when we’re in a hurry, we only think we’re making ourselves clear. We think we’ve said exactly what was on our minds to say when, in reality, we only said half. Getting mad at people for not reading your mind is just ugly dumb.
• Be a team player. Come to company meetings and, by all means, come to work prepared and on time. Contribute to, but don’t hog, the discussion. Don’t try to always be right, and don’t try to always have the last word. Those are and ogre’s favorite tricks.
• Be modest. Don’t brag or take too much credit. If you did something particularly well, give yourself a chest bump in the mirror, brag to your spouse and then kind of keep it on the low. Act like you meant to do it - not like it so shocked you that you can’t quit talking about it!
• Respect confidences. If anyone tells you something in private, for crying out loud, don’t say it out loud. If the boss tells you you’re an assett to the office, there’s just little need to go to every person in the office and repeat it.
• Avoid bigotry. Never make suggestive comments or tell jokes that make fun of a co-worker’s sex, culture, sexual preference, race, or gender. That one should go without saying, but we all know there are plenty of barbarians running amok. One thing a lot of people don’t think of is this - if you’re in the presence of someone who is making these sorts of comments, their nasty is splattering all over you. Especially if you happen to laugh. Just vamose.
• Be thoughtful. Clean up after yourself. Knock before entering a co-worker’s office or cubicle. Treat basically everyone as though they were your equal - because, ummmm, they are.